If you're not swimming or skinny dipping...get out

Unlike yesterday, today was my day for soccer. Now everyone was rooting for Argentina and they had sixty percent odds that they would win, and what happened? Germany kicked their asses. Or lack their of. It was amazing. 4-0. If that wasn’t enough, the next game had three penalties in a record time of one minute and no one scored. But, Spain won. Still, at least Paraguay lost like they deserved to. They beat Japan unfairly, won on false pretences, and therefore deserved to lose.
After soccer, I had to go to the pool with my brother and while I was swimming forty laps it hit me. People don’t go to the pool to swim anymore. Most people just stand around, laugh, and throw balls. Some people actually get angry at the people who are trying to swim because they take up too much space and accidentally run into them. So I blame you, swimming pools, for making it a place for people to just stand in and get a tan, hitherto causing obesity in America. Luckily enough, I have a cure. See, after people get obese from not swimming in pools, they stop swimming because of their grotesque figure. Therefore, they lose all exercise and die a horrible death. My plan is to put all fat people in one giant pool and leave them there for a week, so they can get used to being weightless again. That way, when they finally get out of the water and have the Earth’s pull on them, they’ll get so sick of it that they’ll actually exercise and work off the pounds. I will make millions.
Hm what else? Well my mom returned my Bible to the library “accidentally”, so I have nothing to read. But, I coped by finding this site called redit.com. It’s this awesome site where you can just go from page to page and it teaches you random things about everything in the world. I think if I spend enough time on it, I’ll be a genius.
Hmmm, lastly there’s a rapping weather man on the fox channel so if the writing career doesn’t work, I’ll just do that, for Cnn of course.
I think that’s all I have for today except that I love random information from random website.